Controlling Ex Partner

So this was the blog I was drafting out when I posted my previous! Only new news is, I have a new working laptop now!

I was in a 5 month relationship, and he seemed really nice – I was surprised at myself for picking someone so lovely. But everything changed – a month and a bit into the relationship, he started to show me his anger, and how he ‘flips out’ – obviously I just coped with this as I wasn’t perfect myself.

So it went on and it was around 2/3 months into the relationship – when we found out I was pregnant. He really couldn’t show any care or interest or even happiness. He over worked himself and then took it out on me. I woke him up once (it was 12pm) he was being stupid and stayed up all night cleaning (not that there was a difference! so his own fault you should say for lack of sleep) I asked him if he could pick me up which he agreed to – when I got home that was it, a massive argument and him slamming doors and clearly punching stuff – having a full blown anger session because ‘I woke him up’ – how would he of acted when the baby woke him up? Something I wouldn’t like to think of.

Then we came down visiting my family in Kent (bare in mind I was living near Manchester at the time!) he showed his anger and moods to my mum, he singled out my little brother (did you know children under the age of 7 NEVER tell a lie?) so I ignored him – and he knows how protective I am of my little brother – he expected my family to wait on him, and hand his food to him – something I find lacks the respect!

It came to night – he started texting and I wanted to sleep – he started shouting baring in mind I have 3 younger siblings under the age of 10 asleep and my mum who’s trying to sleep cos she’s had enough of him treating her like shit. So he comes in shouting and screaming and turns around and goes ”I don’t want my kid turning out like you and topping itself” then he got right in my face with him hand near his head – obviously I told him if he was going to hit me he may as well do it now.

He then ruined my made up relationship with my dad, and tried to make things 10x worst so I told him to go home. Which he did after crying. I gave him one last chance – but nothing, he made me feel sick, he as manipulative and controlling.

So that’s that! I was recently talking to my midwife and I told him how he was and how he acted and so did my mum. She said she was proud of me for getting out as I was in a domestic violence relationship and she wished more girls would leave before its too late!

She made me realise that everything he was doing was controlling, if I wasn’t ¬†home it was my fault that he had to buy uniform for work (he had a key) if I was out with friends I was meant to be home at a certain time. If I was at bingo, he always wanted to come as well. It’s like he was keeping an eye on my every move.

He still hasn’t left me alone, he’s obsessed and harassing me still.

I advise any male/female in a relationship similar, where your partner is making you feel low and degraded to leave asap! Don’t wait for it to get worst, and don’t wait for the worst to happen! There are charities out there to help you.

Women’s Aid

National Domestic Violence Helpline

 
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