Simple Steps To Improve Your Relationship

Simple Steps You Can Take To Improve Your Relationship

There isn’t anything wrong with your favorite person in the world, except for being maddeningly human. That seems to run in our Race. Despite being universally flawed, we expect a great deal from each other, notice each other’s mistakes and weaknesses, and try to correct our loved one’s faults. This gets us the opposite of what we hope for in our relationship so why not try something else?

3 simple steps you can take

  1. Let your partner know what you expect.
    It is romantic when someone reads our desires and meets them without our asking. Some people are better at doing this than others. Many cannot do it at all because not everyone has that kind of internal radar. What seems obvious to you may not even be visible to someone else.

    If you want your wishes and needs met, tell the other person what you need and want. Let them know what simple steps or actions make you feel loved and cared for. Telling your partner, “I need you to greet me when you come home from work,” can improve the relationship more than you may think.

    You get your need met, and the other person can prove how awesome they are by creating the habit of greeting you.
  2. Notice what he or she does right.
    Be aware of what the other person does that is helpful, useful, or meaningful, and let them know that you’ve noticed. This tells your friend they are seen and appreciated, and we all need that.

    It may feel clumsy to do this at first, but clumsy appreciation is better than none. Just say something like, “Thanks that really helped me out.” Or, “It’s so pleasant to have a clean car, thanks for getting mine washed.” Or, “I’m so happy you keep the toilet bowel sparkling clean.”

    Affirm your partner in this way every day for a week, as an experiment, and see whether it makes a positive difference.
  3. Remind yourself the other’s faults are also positives (really).
    We have all been told, since childhood, that we are too this, or too that. Maybe your love bunny is always too stubborn, too quiet, too loud, to easy going, too disorganized, too serious, too happy-go-lucky, or too perfect.

    It helps to remember that what you see as a weakness in your partner is also a strength. Being stubborn can also become persistence. People who are quiet hear things that others miss. A disorganized person is often spontaneous and fun to be with. None of us can be everything so it is futile to expect others to be.

    Take another look at what annoys you about your partner and make an effort to see how it can also be a positive. They will not change unless they want to anyway so you may as well make yourself less annoyed.

Make it a Game, or Not

These simple steps, that will improve your relationship, do require effort. Keep it light and make a game out of practicing them. Rather than expecting results, just be aware and see what happens.

However, if you feel better taking this seriously, forming a plan, and writing down observations with the date and time, hats off to you. We all want the freedom to be ourselves which means giving that freedom to others.

 
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