The Burden of Emotion: The Story of Jessie's Struggle with Anxiety


This two-part article was written exclusively for by Jessie55 on In this article, she discusses her struggle with anxiety, the divorce of her parents, her alcohol and drug abuse, and how she has begun to change her life for the better.

I have memories of going to many therapy sessions when I was very young, and I also remember taking tests that would supposedly determine what was wrong with me. I always felt like people tried to give me special attention, even though I did not ask for it.

A Stressed-Out Kid

I remember being pulled out of class to be asked questions or talk about my problems. I remember thinking that the other children thought that something must be wrong with me. It was an embarrassing experience.

As my parents and I would find out, I carried a lot of worry around with me that I was not able to control. As I got older, during my teenager years, our family doctor prescribed me the anxiety medication known as Paxil. Not only was I still dealing with high-end anxiety in my teen years, but I started to get heart palpitations, which were concerning.

The Destructive Teen Years

All throughout my years of growing up, I have dealt with a lot. In my eyes, no child should ever have to go through the divorce of their parents, or have their mother kidnap them and their sister, or witness their mother's hardcore drug use and their father's alcohol abuse.

So as anyone can guess, my teen years were the most destructive years of my life. Most of my days included drinking, drugs, sex and self-harm. This was all just the beginning of an even bigger disaster. When you feel like no one cares, or has cared about you, it's hard to not slip into a spiral of inward hate.

In Part II of this article, Jessie55 discusses how maturity finally opened her eyes to her drug abuse, how she sought help for her addiction, and her new positive outlook on life.


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